SKURKAS POEM [COMPETITITION!!!!!1]
#1
Its My Birthday! 
Hello and welcom to today i see you give you give me poem i give you jobb!

I you tpost poem boellow and i give you my eternal money and thanks and gratitude 

It has to not make sense, it has to be stipid!!!!!!1

RULES:
The 3 best poems selected by me and my friends, Valeriya Hultberg and Julius "fuck bleaky blainders" man

Those 3 poems will give the writer an opportunity, on the server these 3 people will have a standoff where you have to improvise a rhyming rhyme.
The winner of that final stage will recieve 50k ingame (Which means i didnt false advertise as its my eternal money, if you never spend it)
Slight Edit: To be perfectly fair and skurkasly generous the 2nd and 3rd place will get a trabant each!
If somehow I would post a poem and win, the 2nd and 3rd placers will split and get 25k each

INTRODUCING THE JUDGESS!
Judge Skurkas                                                   Judge Valeriya                                            Judge Julius
[Image: Mm6oBfP.jpg]                                            [Image: pC92MLD.jpg]                                     [Image: WeMXUF1.jpg]
Skurkas is stupid, makes bad judge!                     Valeriya will eat your ear and judge!               Julius will get banned and judge
#2
A dog wandered into our garden one day,

A friendly old mutt, didn't look like a stray.
We never discovered whence he had come,
But we brushed him and fed him and the kids called him Rum.

Now as family members, even dogs must work hard,
So we put Rum on duty next door in our yard,
Bright eyed and watchful by night and by day,
But not much of a guard dog, I'm sorry to say.

He barked at the cats and he'd bark at a toad,
He barked at the cattle outside on the road,
He barked at the horses - so where did he fail?
You see, Rum liked people, and he just wagged his tail.

He liked the yard labour, an amiable bunch.
They fed our dog tidbits and scraps from their lunch.
Rum wolfed it all down, but to our dismay
He seemed to get fatter with each passing day.

Then one night when Rum was laid at his ease,
A burglar crept in just as quiet as you please.
He saw no alarms, heard now siren howling,
No guard dog for sure, there'd be barking and growling.

But Rum was awake and he'd seen him alright,
Delighted with company this time of the night,
He flew through the yard, his new friend to greet,
And his weight bowled the burglar right off of his feet.

The intruder got up and ran off with a wail
And Rum right behind him still wagging his tail.
He departed the yard he'd come in to burgle
Like a champion athlete clearing a hurdle.

But Rum couldn't jump gates, so sadly instead
He picked up the thief's wallet and went back to bed.
Next morning the evidence everyone viewed,
When Rum brought it to us, (just a little bit chewed).

Once given the wallet, the police didn't fail
To capture the burglar and put him in jail.
His confession like wildfire spread through the town,
How a big vicious guard dog had knocked the thief down.

We all howled with laughter when we heard the story,
And Rum was our hero, he was basking in glory.
There have been no attempts since to burgle our yard,
For everyone knows now that Rum is on guard.
Kind regards,
Weezy

[Image: X8prSQG.jpg]

The following 2 users Like Weezy_'s post:
  • Self, Andrew Juniperfield
#3
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I've got tourettes
Piss off you smelly swede
[Image: lewis-hamilton-silverstone2022.gif]
The following 3 users Like jhayw's post:
  • Andrew Juniperfield, sebasti161, Marty
#4
roses are red
violets are violet
skurkas lurkas is
my favorite anime
The following 2 users Like sebasti161's post:
  • jhayw, Andrew Juniperfield
#5
There was a little mouse named Keith.
He circumcised men with his teeth.

He did it while on a leaf.
His name was Keith.

He had teeth.

Fini
[Image: giphy.gif]
The following 1 user Likes Marty's post:
  • Andrew Juniperfield
#6
I see this as a chance to express my poem about Falcon

Falcao, there’s only one real Falc
We all know a fake who runs his mouth
Falcon? The fuck is he
Sounds like talcon you put on a baby
Shit, he’s American too?
Just like Liverpool we say..

Fuck you
The following 1 user Likes Falc's post:
  • Andrew Juniperfield
#7
Roses are red
Violets are glorious
Don't try to surprise
Oscar Pistorious
Kind Regards

That guy. Ive resigned from contributor 4 times now.
The following 1 user Likes Arch.B's post:
  • Andrew Juniperfield
#8
Added actual thing to original post
#9
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I can't rhyme
Czechoslovakia
The following 1 user Likes Teddy's post:
  • Andrew Juniperfield
#10
(02-24-2018, 02:58 PM)Teddy Wrote: Roses are red
Violets are blue
I can't rhyme
Czechoslovakia

Roses are ash
Violets are ash
Everything is ash
Nuclear war
[Image: 7EmE7CZ.png]
Have I helped you or am I friendly?
+rep
The following 2 users Like Archer's post:
  • Andrew Juniperfield, Teddy


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