Divey's AMA

[Divey]

Job interview; Mr Di Vey.


1. Can you tell me a little about yourself?
I could.

2. How did you hear about the position?
From resigning.

3. What do you know about the company?
What?

4. Why do you want this job?
I'm too lazy to get a job.

5. Why should we hire you?
Ermm, I don't know.

6. What are your greatest professional strengths?
Mad banter.

7. What do you consider to be your weaknesses?
Chocolate.

8. What is your greatest professional achievement?
Making it through the week.

9. Tell me about a challenge or conflict you've faced at work, and how you dealt with it.
Please stop.

10. Where do you see yourself in five years?
5 years older.

11. What's your dream job?
Unemployed.

12. What other companies are you interviewing with?
None.

13. Why are you leaving your current job?
Got stuff to do.

14. Why were you fired?
I wasn't.

15. What are you looking for in a new position?
I'm not.

16. What type of work environment do you prefer?
Can this be multiple choice please.

17. What's your management style?
I don't know.

18. What's a time you exercised leadership?
What?

19. What's a time you disagreed with a decision that was made at work?
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20. How would your boss and co-workers describe you?
Ask them.

21. Why was there a gap in your employment?
What?

22. Can you explain why you changed career paths?
School work mainly.

23. How do you deal with pressure or stressful situations?
I stress out.

24. What would your first 30, 60, or 90 days look like in this role?
I don't know what this role is.

25. What are your salary requirements?
Please stop.

26. What do you like to do outside of work?
Nothing really.

27. If you were an animal, which one would you want to be?
A wolf, they're awesome.

28. How many tennis balls can you fit into a limousine?
I've never tried.

29. Are you planning on having children?
I'd like to in the future.

30. What do you think we could do better or differently?
?

31. Do you have any questions for us?
Why?