Evolution News Issue-Halloween '16
#1
Evolution News
Bringing the screams of the public to the main stream - 31 OCT 2016
SRU Units Scared To Death
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2 SRU Units,plus a sergeant,were killed when famed prankster and shit-poster Sebastian Leon pulled a prank which caused a heart attack.Sebastian Leon's lawyer,Michael Martinez has said that 'He was just having Halloween Fun'. The Police Department has not made any comments.

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Mentally Ill Man Obsessed With Stephen Hawking Scares Citizens

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A chef who is obsessed with British scientist Stephen Hawking has made an appearance in front of Bank Of America in a replica Stephen Hawking wheelchair.He was 'convinced' to leave the area by a vigilante.His dead body was found in Lake, apparently dead because of suicide.


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Cultists Open Shop on Top Street

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Several Halloween cultists who pretended to curse the Rebels a couple of weeks ago have opened a satanic-themed souvenir shop in Top Street.The shop had attention from commuters,and sold their entire franchise of skeleton costumes and bloody baby dolls,which we hope were really dolls.

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Ghost At Pub
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A picture of a Ghost was captured a man in the local pub, this caused a lot of panic in the pub and several people ran away from the pub. The police tried to arrest the Ghost and pointed a gun at it and shouted 'FearRP', the ghost buggered off into the sky.


The Lighter Side
A man dressed as a clown who was trying to scare little kids was found naked in a van, near the lake. He was arrested for disturbing the peace and claimed he wasn't a pedo.

Dave the Pigeon's funeral had 567 people attend in person and was broadcast on local news with 724 people watching. The man who killed him said he was very sorry and had eggs thrown at him.

A local Inventor died testing one of his Inventions, a man nearby said 'RIP'. The picture was supplied by a police officer watching him.
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Copyright Dawson Publishing. Do not copy. All Information was up to date at the time this was written.
Stories Written By dawson270500 and Sharp. Edited by dawson270500. Images by dawson270500 and Anonymous Source.
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  • sebasti161
#2
Please Reply Typos and misspellings.

Thanks
dawson270500-Evolution News, Founder.
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#3
omg im mentioned
#4
Very nice
Regards,
Panda
NOT AN Administrator
#5
most impressive news article I have seen so far


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