RE: [Unofficial] FUMUKU International - Eisenhorn - 05-29-2013
I remember those melons and a certain training incident in the prisons, and peoples propensity to kill all the melons even the hostages!
Please find attached my personnel file for FUMUKU Int. record keeping.
Spoiler :
Zaeed Massani FUMUKU International personnel file.
Name: Zaeed Massani.
Security Clearance: C
Specialization: Reconnaissance, locating targets of interest, security, detention, interrogation, paperwork, missile battery construction, filing reports, sarcasm.
Site of operations: FUMUKU Int. HQ, FUMUKU humvees, restrooms, FUMUKU transport units, anywhere with a comfy chair.
FUMUKU operations involved in: Removal of a dictatorial government without killing anyone, security contract for presidential security, operation build a rocket battery, FUMUKU blackout operations x 3, FUMUKU find operations x 12, assisted in construction of new HQ, operation build detention cells.
Profile: Z. Massani is a low level FUMUKU security officer most often seen assisting in various capacities notably advising on tactics. He possesses a preternatural ability to spot suspicious activity, and a sarcasm filter which is obviously broken. Prone to bouts of megalomania and paperwork, he is efficient if not unnerving as a co-worker. If left to his own devices, particularly odd occurrences are infinitely more probable. For instance one day at FUMUKU Int. HQ, he was left alone by Mr Malkrin for a period not exceeding 84minutes. He was instructed to maintain security and left to it. On Mr Malkrin's return he noted the addition of 2 quad cell automated long range missile systems to the property, and a comprehensive if not psychologically damaging detention cell had been constructed. When questioned where these had materialised from, Massani was found to be wearing a cactus as a hat sitting in his underwear in the office, whilst singing ''what is love'' doing paperwork. His only reply being, ''Security, I was bored'' at this point the missile system obliterated a seagull that had perched on top of a FUMUKU vehicle, said vehicle was also obliterated. This anomalous behaviour only occurs when Massani is left unobserved for a period of longer than 13minutes. At no point is he to be left unsupervised or bored, due to the sheer insanity which will result, or the psychiatric bills for D-class personnel, anyone remember his recreation of El-Alamein whilst wearing a FUMUKU flag as a cape? He is also the self appointed director of FUMUKU Legal services even though no such department is recognised within FUMUKU Int. nobody has thought to challenge him on this due to the fact all the legal work he has created benefits the company and keeps him occupied. The missile battery still exists, although pigeons have been exterminated in a 30mile radius.
Yours faithfully Z. Massani, director of FUMUKU legal services, I.D 3514
RE: [Unofficial] FUMUKU International - Toxic - 05-30-2013
Which reminds me; don't reenact scenes from Platoon with Charlie Sheen.
RE: [Unofficial] FUMUKU International - D0ctor - 05-30-2013
(05-29-2013, 11:48 PM)Zaeed_Massani Wrote: I remember those melons and a certain training incident in the prisons, and peoples propensity to kill all the melons even the hostages!
Please find attached my personnel file for FUMUKU Int. record keeping.
Spoiler :
Zaeed Massani FUMUKU International personnel file.
Name: Zaeed Massani.
Security Clearance: C
Specialization: Reconnaissance, locating targets of interest, security, detention, interrogation, paperwork, missile battery construction, filing reports, sarcasm.
Site of operations: FUMUKU Int. HQ, FUMUKU humvees, restrooms, FUMUKU transport units, anywhere with a comfy chair.
FUMUKU operations involved in: Removal of a dictatorial government without killing anyone, security contract for presidential security, operation build a rocket battery, FUMUKU blackout operations x 3, FUMUKU find operations x 12, assisted in construction of new HQ, operation build detention cells.
Profile: Z. Massani is a low level FUMUKU security officer most often seen assisting in various capacities notably advising on tactics. He possesses a preternatural ability to spot suspicious activity, and a sarcasm filter which is obviously broken. Prone to bouts of megalomania and paperwork, he is efficient if not unnerving as a co-worker. If left to his own devices, particularly odd occurrences are infinitely more probable. For instance one day at FUMUKU Int. HQ, he was left alone by Mr Malkrin for a period not exceeding 84minutes. He was instructed to maintain security and left to it. On Mr Malkrin's return he noted the addition of 2 quad cell automated long range missile systems to the property, and a comprehensive if not psychologically damaging detention cell had been constructed. When questioned where these had materialised from, Massani was found to be wearing a cactus as a hat sitting in his underwear in the office, whilst singing ''what is love'' doing paperwork. His only reply being, ''Security, I was bored'' at this point the missile system obliterated a seagull that had perched on top of a FUMUKU vehicle, said vehicle was also obliterated. This anomalous behaviour only occurs when Massani is left unobserved for a period of longer than 13minutes. At no point is he to be left unsupervised or bored, due to the sheer insanity which will result, or the psychiatric bills for D-class personnel, anyone remember his recreation of El-Alamein whilst wearing a FUMUKU flag as a cape? He is also the self appointed director of FUMUKU Legal services even though no such department is recognised within FUMUKU Int. nobody has thought to challenge him on this due to the fact all the legal work he has created benefits the company and keeps him occupied. The missile battery still exists, although pigeons have been exterminated in a 30mile radius.
Yours faithfully Z. Massani, director of FUMUKU legal services, I.D 3514
HAHAHA it it bad i just sat at my computer laughing at this for about 5 minutes? How the hell do you come up with this!!!!
RE: [Unofficial] FUMUKU International - Eisenhorn - 05-30-2013
For the attention of FUMUKU personnel records, I have done your paperwork for you, again. Please find personnel reports on these persons. Carthusia Malkrin, 'Toxic', 'DubWub', and 'Moist'. What is it with these guys and codenames, makes paperwork even more difficult.
Spoiler: Mr Malkrins Personnel report
Carthusia Malkrin FUMUKU International personnel file.
Name: Carthusia Malkrin
Security Clearance: A++
Specialization: Micro/macro management of FUMUKU activities. Avoiding paperwork. Disappearing when paperwork needs completion. Capture of hostile persons with minimal force. Criminal investigations, co-ordinating teams in [REDACTED] operations, creating temporal anomalies to disappear paperwork that needs completing.
Site of operations: FUMUKU Int. HQ, .
FUMUKU operations involved in: Everything, ever, period. Far too numerous to list, and the paperwork is in such disarray no accurate amount can be given beyond a lot.
Profile: Carthusia Malkrin is the current CEO of FUMUKU Int. Beyond the innate psychopathic tendencies required of a managing director he exhibits no unusual behaviour (by FUMUKU standards). His hobbies involve protecting society from dangerous individuals and pernicious influences and building armoured vehicles, as well as assisting the police in their oft poorly executed duties. Is known to have an intense hatred of hats, paperwork, narcotics, theft of office supplies, and short shorts. He is exceptionally dedicated to the progress of FUMUKU Int, and will accept no barrier in his path to achieve his goals, strongly driven and determined, he is also charitable and has established several outreach projects from FUMUKU Int, to protect the communities and to nurture the vulnerable. He really likes the colour blue as well. Seriously everything he owns is blue.
-C.Malkrin: ''Hello Mr Massani how can I help you?''
-Z.Massani: ''I'm here to enquire about the apparent absence of paperwork.''
-C.Malkrin: Is seen to be staring at Z.Massani.
-Z.Massani: ''Sir I have to be direct where is the paperwork, applications and personnel reports''
-C.Malkrin: Is seen to point at the window, and when he is unobserved by Z.Massani to promptly vanish
-Z.Massani: Looking out of the window, ''Dear batman punching christ'' Stack of files disposed of out of the window weighed in at 27.4tons
-Z.Massani: Completed this paperwork in a period of 78 continuous hours upon which Mr.Malkrin reappeared.
-C.Malkrin: ''Glad to see all my paperwork is in order''
-Z.Massani: Is seen to raise one finger in response and collapse from exhaustion.
Spoiler: DubWubs personnel report
'DubWub' FUMUKU International personnel file.
Name: Kyle 'DubWub' Satriani
Security Clearance: A+
Specialization: Violence, hostile reconnaissance, target removal, violence, urban pacification, death.
Site of operations: FUMUKU Int. HQ, .
FUMUKU operations involved in: Far too numerous to list, if you're that interested look for any operation with beyond normal fatalities for enemy personnal, anything over 100% is a good indicator.
Profile: 'DubWub' has been with FUMUKU Int since it expanded operations into Evocity. 'DubWub' is a highly valued member of FUMUKU Int, however he exhibits certain psychological traits that make him undesirable for most operations, especially those involving contact with the community or patience. When aggravated or placed in a hostile situation, 'DubWub' experiences no normal emotional change or physiological change, except a massive surge in adrenaline and dopamine. 'DubWub' becomes exceptionally hostile to all persons not working with him, and will once a threshold is met deal out indiscriminate death, often of the buy one get one free variety. Mr Malkrin is the only person who is able to prevent this escalation into the kalashnikov armed grim reaper. Ergo 'DubWub' assists mainly on operations involving high risk security and escalating conflict zones. He has so far in the service of FUMUKU killed [REDACTED] enemy operatives. When under Mr Malkrins guidance he is less likely to resort to terminal violence, and more likely to use psychologically damaging violence as a communication method for his displeasure.
expect Toxic and Moists reports later.
Yours faithfully Chief commissar of paperwork, and director of FUMUKU legal services, Z.Massani I.D 3514
RE: [Unofficial] FUMUKU International - Toxic - 05-31-2013
Well shit man if you don't want a codename just use my alias; Enlisted Buzzkill
RE: [Unofficial] FUMUKU International - Eisenhorn - 05-31-2013
Please find attached personnel report on Moist, personnel report on Toxic will be appended later today.
Spoiler: Personnel file for 'moist
'Moist' FUMUKU International personnel file.
Name: Gordon 'Moist' Leary
Security Clearance: C
Specialization: Security, spelunking, coffee brewing of, analysis of crime scene evidence
Site of operations: FUMUKU Int. HQ, .
FUMUKU operations involved in: Part of the 'core' operatives working under Mr Malkrin, aka a metric **** tonne of them.
Profile: 'Moist' has been with FUMUKU Int since it expanded operations into Evocity. 'Moist' is a highly valued member of FUMUKU Int, a highly resolute person who exhibits no emotional response whilst under pressure, even whilst under gunfire he remains intractable, possible detachment from consequences, when asked about incident: a9q[REDACTED] and how he calmly walked to FUMUKU medical centre after being mauled by an escaped crocodile, he said ''I do well under pressure''. He also makes the finest coffee out of any person in FUMUKU, ridiculously good coffee, and is highly defensive of his coffee making facility. He demonstrates an exceptional aptitude with forensic analysis, and has demonstrated the ability to make strong correlatory connections from minimal evidence. This was shown in incident: S[REDACTED] where his analysis of fibres left behind in a stolen vehicle helped evidence a strong connection to a group of individuals. He is also not to be allowed near any large body of water especially waterfalls. This is due to his inherent disposition to fall off them, whilst he sustains no fatal injuries himself, it is no longer considered 'hilarious' when he vanishes on operations off the side of a waterfall, he has been shown in the presence of waterfalls, to fall over 30ft sideways to fall off them. This may explain his unusual codename, this is the preferred FUMUKU explanation due to the possible alternatives, which whilst hilarious, are not suitable for the workplace.
Spoiler: Personnel file for 'Toxic
'Toxic' FUMUKU International personnel file.
Name: 'Toxic' alternatively 'Enlisted Buzzkill'
Security Clearance: A
Specialization: Security, and policing of FUMUKU personnel
Site of operations: FUMUKU Int. HQ. Also the basement of the HQ in a disused lavatory marked beware of the leopard
FUMUKU operations involved in: Part of the 'core' operatives working under Mr Malkrin, aka a metric **** tonne of them.
Profile: 'Toxic' has been with FUMUKU Int since it expanded operations into Evocity. Of note is his strong dislike for any authority figures outside FUMUKU, and his emphatic responses to them. One incident involving a policeman, a duck and a tube of super-glue required 13 people to be submitted into a mental health institution for psychiatric care. He is highly skilled at his job and has exacting standards but is not recommended for any role involving liasing with local authorities as a representative of FUMUKU Int, anyone remember the babysitting venture FUMUKU tried, one office fan, one two month old child, one role of duct tape, and a $500,000 lawsuit later. He is skilled with firearms and the detention of suspects and is highly respectful and disciplined within the constraints of FUMUKU Int, but reacts negatively, massive understatement, when outside influences attempt to order him in his job. Along with 'DubWub' forms the brash and hard hitting side of FUMUKU Int, especially in the fast reaction units and [REDACTED] operations. Beyond listed only abnormal behaviour is his innate ability to traumatise hundreds of people with standard office supplies. Especially if they were found to be stealing them. He is also the most highly commended member of FUMUKU gaining two citations; FUMUKU Crowbar of Valor, for valor suprisingly enough, Purple Annabelle for Wankers’ Cramp, for facing overwhelming odds and emerging alive in handling hostile paperwork or lack thereof.
Yours faithfully Z. Massani Grand Custodian of Filing, Director of FUMUKU Legal services Int. I.D 3514
RE: [Unofficial] FUMUKU International - Moisty - 05-31-2013
(05-31-2013, 12:52 PM)Zaeed_Massani Wrote: "This may explain his unusual codename, this is the preferred FUMUKU explanation due to the possible alternatives, which whilst hilarious, are not suitable for the workplace."
Hahahaha love it!
RE: [Unofficial] FUMUKU International - Crownguard - 05-31-2013
Out of Character Information
Steam Name: Night Fury
Steam ID:
Your Age:17
Hours on server: 905
RP Events you have been in:Vault RP, Titanic, Fire nexus, more and more
RP Point Amount:20
Ban History on Fearless RP:3
_____________________________________
In Character Information:
Division you are applying for:Security
_____________________________________
Full Name: Luxanna Crownguard IV
All Nicknames: Lux, Night, Night fury.
Age:24
Date of Application:31 May of 2013
_____________________________________
Date of birth: 19/08/1995
Gender:F
Place of Birth:The Hospital of a land far away.
Telephone Number:231-121-9812
Mobile:891-411-5521
Driver's License Number:5612
_____________________________________
Current Residence (Complete in Full)
Address:Classified
Zip code:4531
Suburb / City: Near Evocity
Previous Residence (Complete in Full)
Address:Classified
Zip code:Classified
Suburb / City: Classified
_____________________________________
Why are you applying? Known Associate of FUMUKU, Supporting each and every Aspect of FUMUKU
What is your background in the field you are applying for? Been around weapons, and firefight almost my entire life, Worked for police, FBI, and alot of Spec ops forces.
Why should we pick you for FUMUKU? Associate, and I know what I'm doing when I'm on security duty.
What will you offer FUMUKU? Alot of experience with Security. Weapons, support etc.
Character Bio: Luxanna, is a Noble born. Her Fate was always to become the next queen of a land far far away from Evocity. But she was always more into weapons instead of pretty dresses. When She turned sixteen, She started training at the polic Academy, Training each day, Until she finaly Graduated. She then started training with S.W.A.T, and other spec-ops forces. When she was done training, and practicing. A City named Evocity was wishing for more police forces, So she moved there, and joined the local police, She then rapidly flew up the ranks, Until she decided she would apply for a Corp, Called FUMUKU. Too lazy to actually write a awesum bio
RE: [Unofficial] FUMUKU International - Toxic - 05-31-2013
Zaeed, we don't pay you enough.
RE: [Unofficial] FUMUKU International - Eisenhorn - 05-31-2013
You don't pay me at all xD But nobody else will do the paperwork otherwise so I must persevere and get it completed, also it's bloody good fun xD
