Storytime! TES Fans Only. - Printable Version +- Fearless Forums (https://fearlessrp.net) +-- Forum: General Discussion (https://fearlessrp.net/forumdisplay.php?fid=10) +--- Forum: Off-Topic (https://fearlessrp.net/forumdisplay.php?fid=25) +---- Forum: Archive (https://fearlessrp.net/forumdisplay.php?fid=41) +---- Thread: Storytime! TES Fans Only. (/showthread.php?tid=46826) |
Storytime! TES Fans Only. - mgdwszx - 05-20-2014 I found this browsing the internet and I found it so funny. No credit towards me. You'll only understand if you've played Oblivion and Skyrim. >Playing Oblivion >Walking around the waterfront district trying to score Skooma >See some shady crap happening in the background >Black guy with a pony tail is holding a torch with hoodlums near him >See if he has some dank kush >He's in the thieves guild >Ask him how to roll with the cool kids >Tells me to steal some guy's diary >"Can't kill other during this mission" > I do what I want >Ask hobo for directions >Gives me HIV and tells me where to knick the diary >Travel to the Temple District >Elf beats me there >Punch her in the back of the head inside the guys house >She's unconcious >I knock a bunch of crap over and the owner hears it >Comes running downstairs like a mad vagina >Guards storm in >STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM >Punch the guard and run >Catch the first wagon out of Cyrodiil >Turns out it was a prison transport >Guards haul me to Skyrim >Some mad emperor is there, but he's gagged >Get to Helgen keep >Guy asks me what the fuck I'm doing there >Try to tell him but some vagina interrupts him and sends me to the chopping block >Right as I'm about to be executed a giant fucking bat flies in and murders everyone >Escape from prison >Find out I'm Dragonborn or some shit >Kill giant dragon thing in Nord Heaven >Absorb its entire lifeforce >Leave the life of dragon hunting behind >Start a family >Wife gets pregnant >Go to the village doctor for a checkup >SUDDENLY LABOR >Doctor yells that the baby is coming >I'm so excited for this >The head slowly pops out >Cyrodiil Imperial guard slides out of my wifes vagina >Arrests me and confiscated the diary Fucking Imperial scum RE: Storytime! TES Fans Only. - Jan - 05-20-2014 Funniest TES joke by far: The Elder Scrolls Online. |